Monday, January 7, 2008

Of poverty and corruption

I have been silent for a long time - not for dearth of material or ideas to write on but from sheer laziness and at times hectic traveling. Here are some quick thoughts on some "things" that have been "bothering" me. Towards the end of the year, I was home early one evening when wife and son happened to be out. The only person home was our live-in help who has been with us for over five years. She had been trying to get in touch with her brother-in-law in a village in West Bengal (not very far from Kharagpur - for those who may not know, Kharagpur, or KGP as it is referred to by many, is home to the oldest and the biggest IIT in the country) to get some news of her parents. The b-i-l had a cell phone and was thus, accessible. But that evening she had been frustrated in her attempts to contact him and I told her to ring him up on my cell phone, which she did.

As I reclined, surfing channels for the lack of anything better to do, I heard snatches of her conversation with her b-i-l. B-i-l was asking her to send some money to her parents. She almost blew her top since five/ six months back when she had gone home, she had given her mother Rs5,000. She asked her b-i-l how could her mother have spent Rs5,000 in only five months! I felt miserable at the thought. Rarely has the feeling of bliss on reaching home early so rudely been shattered. Rs5,000 - we probably spend out on one evening's meal in most upmarket restaurants in Mumbai. In this village where her parents stay (a few hours from KGP), there is still no power. In the district headquarters, an uncle of hers lost his life recently because while he was in emergency ward, the 12-16 hour power cuts made sure that modern medicine did not stand a chance. Life is unfair; but that in today's world lives are lost, in a country that is aspiring to be among the world's best, because of lack of bare minimum basic necessities somehow makes a mockery of many of our tall claims.

This is also the same country where an industrialist recently gifted his wife an Airbus 319 on her 44th birthday. While India indeed is shining for a lot of people (including yours truly) and there is a lot to celebrate about, somehow there is a large cross-section of the population which cannot even start to aspire to get out of the grinding vicious cycle of poverty, corruption and darkness that envelope their lives. That brings me to my second story. My driver had saved up Rs100,000 to buy a second room where he stays (his is a family of four people - self, wife, one son and one daughter). The other day he told me that he will not be able to buy the dream second room for quite some time. The story goes something like this - his sister's son is an ITI trained carpenter. Recently he secured a state government job in Mumbai; but before giving him his appointment letter the state government official in-charge demanded Rs150,000 as bribe. The family had no choice but to pool in all their savings to ensure that the young boy received his appointment letter and had a shot at breaking out of the vicious cycle.

My driver told me that the young boy will be drawing his second salary of Rs8,000 in a few days time. The bribe he had to pay was over one and half year's of salary of the boy. I do not know how but somewhere the "system" or society has to become more sensitive and sensitized. Otherwise what is the use of India prospering? Some of us may be able to gift diamonds to our better halves, some will gift aircrafts, some of us may be just satisfied with old fashioned gifts like flowers, books and cards, but how does a greater part of India prosper, how do the have-not's not feel like not-wanted in their own country?

Wednesday, August 29, 2007

Gourmet retailing and Ramesh

Yesterday while going back from office I dropped into the Godrej Nature's Basket store on Warden Road (a tony neighborhood of Mumbai, for those not familiar with Mumbai). This store had opened maybe a couple of years back (then called Godrej Nature Fresh) and was popular in the locality. On Saturday afternoons I used to drop in to pick up veggies on my way back home. Then in the last few months I had not had the time to go there and then they stopped doing home deliveries as well. Yesterday I was in for a big surprise. The store had undergone a massive changeover. Welcome to gourmet retailing.

It was brighter and larger (don't ask me how because it is still the same place). What surprised me was the stocks on the shelves - gourmet food and imported stuff like the kind you rarely find on Indian store shelves. From the Swiss cheeses (sorry, no aamchi paneer), to French wines to the best cold cuts and organic food - it was all there. And yes, some sinful Haagen-Dazs frozen desserts. The price would be a few months salary for most of our countrymen. But this is the heart of one of the wealthiest localities of Mumbai. Of the old store, the only familiar stuff were the vegetables and fruits. At 8:30 PM there was a fair sprinkling of people shopping, including a few foreigners from the neighborhood.

Apparently the makeover has happened in the last one month. And according to one of the staff members, the sales have gone up since then. The staff were smartly dressed in an all black outfit. I got talking to a couple of them - lets call them Ramesh and Himanshu. Ramesh is from Asansol (no don't reach out for the map of India; It is a district in West Bengal and known for its steel industry at one point of time). Ramesh is a graduate, his father used to work in a local factory and his brother has a small business there. He came to Mumbai when a few of his friends studying engineering in Mumbai called him over and asked him to apply for a one-year course in Retail Management. Ramesh was enthusiastic and rattled off his course subjects like sourcing, visual merchandising etc. Himanshu is also a graduate from the Mumbai University and joined Godrej Retail. They were smart, very enthusiastic about their jobs and pleasant to talk to. They travel really long distances to get to their work and work long hours (the store clsoes at 10:30 PM).

Even as I came out of the shop, I had informed a few friends about the makeover and urged them to lighten their pockets by visiting the store. I had spent a pleasant half an hour picking up stuff that I didn't really want to but could not resist. I mean for how long can you resist strawberry cheese cake from Haagen-Dazs? Well, I can't for long.


But more importantly this also set me thinking. Ramesh and Himanshu are probably not bright enough to have gone into an engineering school or a career in the IT industry or become doctor or CAs. Their schooling and background means they do not speak polished English that would have got them into a call centre job. But they are otherwise bright, hard working, willing to learn and are very enthusiastic. Organized retailing is giving them the opportunity. They are looking to become store managers and supervisors very soon and I have no doubt they will and that too sooner rather than later.

And this is a good enough reason to cheer organized retailing. It is creating job opportunities for youngsters where none existed. Even though the jobs are not in millions, but they are already running into thousands. And that is why irrespective of what the comrades in the Left parties say, organized retailing should be encouraged - whether it is Vishal Retail or Wal Mart or Food Bazaar or Reliance Fresh or gourmet retailing like Godrej Nature's Basket.

Friday, June 29, 2007

Mumbai dreams

My car insurance is due for renewal next month. For the last two weeks I have received calls from various general insurance companies seeking appointments and promising me the best rates in town. What a change from the days when one public sector company's products were thrust upon us and one had to run from pillar to post if a claim was due. But today's story is not about the service levels of insurance companies.

Today's story is about a young lad in his late teens who called me up the other day and said he was representing a leading private sector general insurance company. The voice was a bit brash, spoke in casual Hindi and sounded aggressive. He almost demanded an appointment and promised the best rates in town. I called him over to my office and he arrived on time. That is when I saw that he was a young boy. Curiosity got the better of me and I started asking him a few questions:

Self (S): Do you work for XYZ Insurance company or do you represent a DSA?

Boy (B): I work for the company.Here is my visiting card. You can also call up my manager.

S: Are you from Mumbai? Have you done any IRDA course?

B: I am from Ahmedabad. No, I have not done any course. I am class XII pass.

S: Don't you want to study further? How did you land up in Mumbai? Where do you stay?

B: Sir, to study more you need money (to quote him verbatim, Sir ji padne ke liye peesha lagta hai). My father sent me to Mumbai to find work as my income supports my parents and my sister. When I came here I was staying with a relative; but he started demanding money from my parents. Since he was asking for Rs40,000 and we could not afford that, he has turned me out today in the morning.

S: So what are you going to do?

B: I spoke to my manager and he has arranged a small room for me next to our office in Sion for Rs1,300 rent and a deposit of Rs5,000.

S: How did you find this job?

B: When I came here, I saw an ad of this insurance company outside Sion station. I called up the manager and next day presented myself.

S: How much do you earn in this job? Will you do any professional courses later?

B: My fixed salary is Rs6,000 and provident fund is deducted from that. I expect to earn my first commission of Rs10,000 this month. And I think in a year I should be able to earn commissions of Rs125,000 at least. I am confident about that. No, I will not do any courses. But I will definitely achieve something in Mumbai. (To verbatim report his last statement - main yahaan zaroor kuch bankar dikhaaonga)

The firmness in his voice caught me unguarded. Then and more so now I believe that he will prove himself and achieve something in this city. At least I do not have any doubt on that. His dream is the dream of Vijay in Deewar and Agneepath and Gurukant Desai in Guru. I was wondering whether I would have been able to solicit business when the roof over my head had been taken away the same morning. Would I have groveled for business especially before someone who is quite evidently way up on the social ladder? Without being insolent he was confident in what he was asking for.

And that brings me to why I wrote this incident. Reforms have given an opportunity to many people like this boy to have hope and search for a new career. Before setting foot in Mumbai he had worked in the textile market in Ahmedabad and earned a pittance. But now he is dreaming of big things in Mumbai. He still does not aspire to buy a car in the next one year, but wants to buy a house after two years.

I have long believed that the poor and the disenfranchised in this country need opportunities and a shot at doing better things, they do not need the patronage of the politicians and their employment guarantee schemes. The patronage is intended to keep the poor where they are and to be brought out when votes are required. But new opportunities - and like it or not most of them have come through over the last decade because of reforms and liberalization - will unshackle the abilities and the strength of all cross sections of this society. May this boy achieve his dreams. Oh, and I must tell you this - when he gets married, he wants a working spouse.

Friday, May 11, 2007

Glass bowl and a visiting card

It was an early Sunday morning and I was in Oxford Book Store near Churchgate. Wife and son were attending a Soka Gakkai meet and I was reading a collection of Ruskin Bond stories over a spinach quiche with melted cheese and ginger tea (both highly recommended). The Ruskin Bond stories on various people he has met over a period of time really absorbed me. Particularly the one of a police inspector (and also Ruskin Bond's beer drinking partner) who never made it big. The inspector told a fascinating story of the killing of a queen where he let the murderer go scot free looking at the motive and the human angle. I was just finishing the story when my phone rang informing me that my time was up and it was time to pick up wife and son.

I picked up a couple of Ruskin Bond's books for my son and headed towards the cash counter. There was an elderly gentleman at the counter and he was impeccably dressed. On a Sunday morning he was formally attired as disciplined old men tend to be, quite a contrast to my rumpled jeans, T-shirt and chappals. I strolled over to the magazine counter on the left as I waited my turn at the cashier. At this early hour, there was only one person attending customers and no one was in a tearing hurry.

At the counter, there was a glass bowl with a collection of visiting cards - you know the kind one usually sees in various restaurants for draw of lots or for sending promotional literature. Now I have this strange habit of looking at these visiting cards as I while away my time. I also tend to look at the visitor's comments book in different stores, especially when wife is shopping. It is interesting to see which part of the city do people come from into a particular shop, and what their comments are. At times I am also surprised at how easily people leave their mobile phone numbers and addresses. Today a card lying near the top drew my attention briefly. It was a member of the female species with her name starting with "T" and there was something unusual about the card - probably the color or probably the font - that drew my attention.

As I moved towards the payment counter from the magazine racks, I thought I saw this elderly gentleman at the counter quickly taking this particular card from the glass bowl and put it inside a white envelope he had in his hand, which was kept on the counter with one of his hairy arms on top of it. It piqued my curiosity immensely and I went and stood next to this person to get a closer look at him. The counter staff was busy punching in the details of this man's purchases. Total bill in excess of Rs3,000 and all in the form of magazines and office stationery. The person took out crisp five hundred rupee notes from the same envelope and handed it over to the cashier.

Apart from some stationery and note books, he was buying a hordes of magazines. I craned my neck to gauge the reading habits of a person who picks up visiting cards of unknown people from public places. It was varied - the reading habit, I mean. Making it to the shopping basket were Forbes, Fortune, Businessworld, Maxim and Debonair. I did not catch a glimpse all the magazines. This man was in his 50s at least, bald headed and boasted of a huge beer belly. He was dressed in a nice blue full sleeved shirt (I could not catch the brand), was wearing Color Plus cotton trousers of dark blue color and polished black shoes.

As soon as he collected his packets, he moved out of the store and left me thinking. Did he pick up the card or not? I am sure it was not my imagination running riot after reading a couple of Ruskin Bond stories. What was the name on the card? I was cursing myself for not remembering it. What were his intentions? Will he go home and then dial the number of an unknown lady? Or am I imagining too many things after reading the Ruskin Bond stories? As I collected my books and walked out into a bright sunny day, I made a mental note not to drop my card in any glass bowl in any store or restaurant in future.

Monday, April 9, 2007

Of poverty and extremism

It was about 5-6 years back. A routine office work had taken my friend to Jhargram, 190kms from Kolkata and on the main line from Kolkata to Tatanagar (Jamshedpur) on South Eastern railway. Travelers on the Kolkata-Tatanagar route know that Jhargram is where adivasi's get into the train and are a familiar sight with their bundles of cut wood. Often one sees youngsters going to Kolkata to take some exams for government jobs. My friend (let me call him Ani) was working in the IT department of a government owned company. By nature Ani was a friendly and gregarious person. On his visits to Jhargram, he would be put up in the Rajbaari (translates to "King's palace"), where even today one can get a room for Rs550 per night and have a retinue of 5 servants waiting on you.

During this visit, Ani had seen newspaper items about Naxal presence in Jhargram and some associated killings in the region. He asked a local district officer, an adivasi by origin and a very hard working fellow about Naxals. "Babu, do you want to see one of the training camps?", was the response of Murmu. Ani was not only keen at the prospect but also excited. He extended his stay by a day and both of them headed into the jungles the next day.

Deep in the jungles in Salboni (most of the journey was undertaken in a car), inside a hut Ani came face to face with 5-6 young girls. His guess is they were aged anywhere between 12-19 years. His initial questions on why they were not in school etc was met with hostile looks till Murmu (who was also acting as the interpreter) explained to them that the "babu meant no harm". Murmu then asked the girls to get some tea for the babu and that broke the proverbial ice.

After tea, Ani was shown cache of arms used for training, which was kept in a metal trunk underneath a bed. It had arms ranging from small daggers to country made pistols and rifles. As the visit came to an end, Ani proffered the girls two Rs100 notes. While they were obviously happy at this unforeseen bounty, there was something that was bothering them. Murmu clarified, "Babu, what will they do with hundred rupee notes here. Nobody will be able to change it for them. In the villages deep inside the jungle, people have not seen or used notes of such high denomination." Ani then gave whatever money he had in small denominations much to the happiness of the girls and left.

On the way back, Ani asked Murmu, "Are you involved with them?" Murmu replied, "I am not involved with them now. But I have seen the abject poverty and exploitation at close hand. These tribal people are honest people. So from time to time I give them any useful information I may have about police raids etc." Murmu had friends in the police department and used to get information about impending police raids. Similarly he tips off the local newspapers and journalists as well when there is a story to be told.

Throughout the return journey to Kolkata, Ani could not forget the images of the girls who did not know what to do with hundred rupee notes since it was too large a denomination for them. He had spent over five times that money for his two nights in Jhargram Rajbaari. He often thinks about it even today when he reads about the rising Naxal presence in the country. He is not surprised. Given the linkages and infiltration within the administration, the abject poverty and exploitation, the Naxals will always find willing recruits to join them in their deathly dance of violence and retribution. Another form of exploitation? Who knows?

(Note: The events mentioned above are true and based on my discussions with Ani (name changed).)

Wednesday, April 4, 2007

Have a laugh

Today I will highlight some headlines and adverts in the morning newspapers that caught my eye.

The first one: The Babu Jagjivan Ram Centenary Celebration Committee has released half page advertisement today in Hindustan Times, which highlights "some important facts". I wanted to highlight two of these:

1. "He laid the foundation of nationalization in India by nationalizing private airlines and established Indian Airlines and the Air India"

Given the way Air India - at one time rated the best airline in the world when the Tatas used to run it - has shaped up since nationalization and has no notable achievements to its credit since then, I would have thought all admirers of Babu Jagjivan Ram would rather hide this fact. Should we question the intelligence of the Committee Members who were involved in designing and proof reading this ad or there are people who still genuinely believe that Babu Jagjivan Ram did a great thing by nationalizing Air India? The only people who would thank him for this would be the ageing air hostesses and all the union bosses of Air India. Definitely not any fare paying passenger.

2. "In 1974 when he was the Defence Minister, India won a war for the first time ever in its history. Nearly one lakh Pakistani soldiers surrendered and Bangladesh was created."

First, Bangladesh was created in 1971. At least basic historical facts should not be misrepresented. And then again, many would consider that India had won the 1965 Indo-Pak war, although a UN ceasefire ended the war. And this is not the febrile imagination of a patriotic Indian, but read the following comments:

a) Dennis Kux's "India and the United States estranged democracies" also provides a summary of the war.
Although both sides lost heavily in men and materiel, and neither gained a decisive military advantage, India had the better of the war. New Delhi achieved its basic goal of thwarting Pakistan's attempt to seize Kashmir by force. Pakistan gained nothing from a conflict which it had instigated.

b) An excerpt from Stanley Wolpert's India, summarizing the Indo-Pakistani War of 1965, is as follows:
In three weeks the second IndoPak War ended in what appeared to be a draw when the embargo placed by Washington on U.S. ammunition and replacements for both armies forced cessation of conflict before either side won a clear victory. India, however, was in a position to inflict grave damage to, if not capture, Pakistan's capital of the Punjab when the cease-fire was called, and controlled Kashmir's strategic Uri-Poonch bulge, much to Ayub's chagrin.

c) TIME magazine analyzing the conflict, reported that India held 690 Mi2 of Pakistan territory while Pakistan held 250 Mi2 of Indian territory in Kashmir and Rajasthan, but had lost half its armour.
Cut off from U.S. and British arms supplies, denied Russian aid, and severely mauled by the larger Indian armed forces, Pakistan could continue the fight only by teaming up with Red China and turning its back on the U.N. ... India, by contrast, is still the big gainer in the war. Shastri had united the nation as never before.

(Source: Wikipedia)

As a patriotic India, I would expect that an ad like this released in India would actually hail India as the victor in the 1965 war.

The second one: A small news item in Economic Times caught my eye:

"Mumbai as Int'l Finance Centre: Cabinet to take a call"

I thought an overzealous sub-editor would have out a wrong headline. After all how can the cabinet decide whether Mumbai will become an international, global, galactic, Asian or South Asian Financial centre? I mean the cabinet can decide cement prices but surely it cannot decree what Mumbai will be come in a global context. Surely even Priya Ranjan Das Munshi will not be able to draft a law to that effect. But no, this does not seem to be the work of a late night sub-ed. Read the news item:

"The Cabinet will take a final call on whether Mumbai is ready to become a global financial hub. The high-powered expert committee..."

Need I say anything more?

The third one: Another headline from the ET:
"No legal bar on tainted becoming ministers: Govt
The Centre on Tuesday told the Supreme Court that there is no express bar under the Constitution which requires that the tainted ministers charged with commission of serious offences should resign."

I am amazed. Since there is no constitutional bar, what this government is saying is that it is free to appoint criminals as ministers and they do not have to resign. I wonder what crimes are barred and not barred by our constitution. I am planning to get hold of the list soon.

The last one: And lastly look at what the Congress party, which says it is the natural party born to rule the country and would like all of us to believe its secular ideals and modern outlook, is promising voters in Uttar Pradesh. According to a ToI headline, "UP Cong promises the moon"

The party has, in its manifesto, pledged to provide legal immunity to quota laws by putting them in the 9th schedule of the constitution and to give SC status to "machua" (boatmen) and 15 subgroups in this caste.

And this is what the heir apparent in the party has to say during his campaign - "After 15 years, now they are asking for one more term for development. This is a false promise. They have ruled you by dividing you on the lines of caste and religion," Rahul said amidst applause. Ha, ha! Congress party does not believe in divide and rule. And here is Mickey Mouse signing off.

Sunday, March 25, 2007

Cricket World Cup 2007: Dispatches from West Indies and India

Last few days have been very hectic for me. I have been at multiple places at the same time trying to cover all the happenings in the West Indies and the repercussions back home, much like Salman Rushdie's protagonist in The Midnight's Children. Here are my reports (unedited, unaltered)

24th March 2007 (2:15 AM IST): India's men in blues have lost rather surrendered to the Sri Lankan team. "What do these Bangladeshi's and Sri Lankans eat that our players don't," asked the wife long distance, in a voice that was more lethal than Gabbar Singh's in Sholay when he asked, "Yeh, Ramgarh waale apne chokariyon ko kaun se chakki ka pisa hua aata khilate hain?" These days you can carry on a silly conversation long distance given the way telecom tariffs have come down. "Non veg food and beef steaks," I said quickly referring to my notes of my meetings with the Sri Lankan and the Bangladeshi captain. Wifey, prone to not listening when her better half is speaking like any self respecting Bong girl said, "They should have more Bongs in the team. The fish will do the trick." Fish and beef? I could not see the correlation, but I let it pass. This was no time for frivolities, as Bertie would have said. It was time for action and reporting.

24th March, 2007 (4:30 AM IST): The press conferences are over. Rumors are flying thick and fast. Greg Chappell was rattled by inflammatory questions posed to him by the members of the fourth estate, which indicates that some people may be plotting against him. A source in the Port-of-Spain police force said that Greg has asked for additional police protection. No one who is known to Greg is allowed to meet him alone in the room, especially after the sad death, now confirmed murder, of Bob Woolmer by one or more people he seemed to have known well.

The Trinidad police is not taking any chances and only unknown persons are allowed to go and meet him. He has been provided with bullet proof jacket to be worn at all hours. No Indians are allowed to meet him. In fact, Greg Chappell apparently got the scare of his life when a hotel employee tried to stuff the newspaper on the door handle and as a result made some suspicious noises. The said bell boy has been detained for further questioning and the newspaper has been send for forensic examination to Washington.

Dravid in the post match conference said, "I take full responsibility. Now the selectors have an easy job ahead of them for 2011. They know which sixteen will certainly not be there."

23rd March, 2007 (5:00 AM IST): The Pakistan team sent out a congratulatory note to Greg Chappell thanking him for ensuring that India was out of the World Cup as well. There is a fair chance that now they will not be beaten black and blue when they return home. When asked, Greg Chappell said, "I am not employed by you people and I am not prepared to answer it." He also said that congratulations were not due just to him, but to the entire team since he thinks "it's a collective responsibility" and he would love to share credits with people it is due to.

Geo TV has reported that Khawar Zaidi, a Pakistan diplomat, is being flown in from Washington to personally greet Greg Chappell and Rahul Dravid, along with the rest of the Indian team on behalf of the Pakistan government. Pakistan government has promised land to the Indian team in the upmarket Defence Housing Colony in Clifton in Karachi. President Musharraff's campaign in the forthcoming elections will focus on India's early ouster from the World Cup. Things are indeed happening fast.

24th March 2007 (7:00 AM IST): Sachin Tendulkar, Vice Captain, said, "I am looking forward to the 2011 World Cup," as he stepped out of the hotel to go for a photo shoot. Apparently ESPN and Star Sports have given him a lucrative contract to be one of the panelists in their illustrious list, which includes greats like Sunil Gavaskar. The next four years Sachin plans to devote to rigorous training of his vocal chords in anticipation of the challenging job ahead.

The hotel were the Indian team is staying wore a deserted look. Everybody was out (partying) and those who were not out were having small parties in their rooms.

24th March 2007 (9:30 AM - 8:00 PM IST): India has woken up to the news that India is most likely out of the World Cup. I just flew in (in a time machine, of course) to get the reactions in India.

Kolkata: In Kolkata, a procession was brought out by cricket lovers demanding the reinstatement of Jag Mohan Dalmiya at the helm of BCCI and Sourav Ganguly as the Indian cricket captain. Buddhadeb Bhattacharjee, the embattled Chief Minister of West Bengal said, "I will ask Prakash (Karat) to raise it in the next meeting of the UPA coordination committee and our MPs will also raise the issue in parliament after it reconvenes after the current recess."

Mumbai: A member of the Mumbai Cricket Association and the Prabhadevi Morning Walker's Association has said that Sachin should be made the non-playing captain till younger talent is groomed, preferably from Mumbai. A despondent cricket fan said, "The Indian team is fit only to play Rakhee's bouncers." Yuvraj Singh has apparently refused to play ball and vowed his loyalities towards another starlet.

Bhopal: Kiran More, the erstwhile selector, has squarely blamed Sourav Ganguly. He said, "The Indian team's entry into the 2003 World Cup finals had raised India's hopes and expectations. If only Ganguly had not led the team into the finals then we had almost managed to forget 1983." Off the record he said that is why he had dropped Ganguly and tried to hound him out of Indian cricket.

Somewhere in Uttar Pradesh: Rahul Gandhi, the crown prince of Congress, interrupted his campaign for the forthcoming UP elections and took of his skull cap he wears when he is Deoband or Aligarh to speak to the press. He said, "If my grandmother had been alive, she surely would have been the Prime Minister of India and then India would have won the World Cup. Look at 1983, who was the Prime Minister then?"

And in true traditions of the Gandhi family when asked what he was going to do about the loss, he said, "Humein dekhna hain, hum dekhenge..." "Rahul baba resembled his dear father when he said this," observed an old timer as he wiped a tear from the corner of his eyes. Rahul also said that BJP and Samajwadi Party were to be blamed for India's loss since they only encouraged wrestling (SP) and stick wielding (the RSS).

Delhi: A section of the Congress has demanded that Sonia Gandhi replace Sharad Pawar as the President of the BCCI and Rahul Gandhi be made the Chairman of the selection committee, since he had secured admission to St Stephen's College, New Delhi, under the sports quota, when he did not meet academic standards, which only goes to show what a great sportsman he is. "Sonia lao, cricket bachao" is the slogan coined by Ambika Soni and Mani Shankar Iyer jointly. Sonia has refused to comment and is maintaining her sphinx like silence. During the day she only spoke to her daughter, Priyanka.

Meanwhile the BJP has blamed the Congress for India's performance. They said because Italy does not play cricket, Sonia Gandhi does not encourage our cricketers. They also blamed Indira Gandhi for the creation of Bangladesh without which the tragedy of losing to Bangladesh could not have happened. "Na rahegi baans, na bajegi bansoori" was their inimitable logic. Atal Behari Vajpayee has refused to be drawn into the controversy and has decided not to campaign for the UP polls since he is unwell (any cricket fan would understand and sympathise with him).

Kamal Nath, Union Minister of Trade & Commerce, has blamed the lobby producing cricket bats for India's woes. He has said India will ban the export of cricket bats so that more bats at lower prices are available in India for our budding cricketers. He said his government will impose price limits on cricket bats and the government will supply bats to minorities on a preferential basis in line with the PMs statement that "minorities have first right on the country's resources." He said he will also urge the Pakistan administration to take similar steps.

Mumbai, ZEE TV studios: In a hurriedly convened press conference. Pradeep Guha, ZEE TVs CEO, announced that his channel would start airing a new serial from Monday titled "Kyonki Sachin bhi kabhi cricket khelta tha". The serial to be produced by Balaji Telefilms will be directed by none other than Ekta Kapoor, India's soap opera queen. Pradeep Guha said, "This serial will be a hit with housewives across the country as they would regain the control of the TV remote that they had lost since the start of the World Cup."

25th March 2007 (5:00 AM IST): The Sri Lankan skipper, Mahela Jayewardene said, "Cricket is a funny game." From where he is sitting, I am sure he sees many funny things. Meanwhile the Bermuda captain, Irvine Romaine, has said, "That the whole of corporate India wants us to beat Bangladesh. Don't worry, we will try our best." So corporate India and Bermuda is rising to save India's team for another battle another day.

Rumors are that corporate India is trying to fix the match and has approached the Bangladeshi players to throw away their match so that India can qualify. Prakash Karat, General secretary of CPI (M), who has recently fallen in love with industrialists and industrialization has reportedly promised corporate India that he will ensure that West Bengal government offers land for settling the Bangladeshi players if they lose to Bermuda and are unable to go back to their country. Bermuda players have vowed to take India to the next round. There is hope yet.

25th March 2007 (6:00 AM IST): Ricky Ponting said that he preferred the Australian way of winning rather than the Indian way of losing. He was reacting to Sunil Gavaskar's comments that while Aussies were unpopular champions of the game, Indians were more popular (losers). "Sachin has more sponsors running after him than the entire Aussie team," said Gavaskar when I met him in the hotel lobby.

25th March 2007 (9:00 AM IST): In the offices of a foreign brokerage house in Nariman Point, Mumbai, an analyst is writing a "Buy" report on Zee Tele. His earlier fears that Zee would have a poor quarter because of the World Cup will not come true any longer. But he is not happy after having been dragged into his Dilbertian cubicle on a bright Sunday morning. "Curse the Indian team," he muttered under his breath as he typed furiously on the keyboard. A sentiment with which the rest of the country agreed.

After 48 hours of non-stop working and criss-crossing the Atlantic, I need some sleep now. Ciao. Good night, sleep tight and don't let the bugs bite.

(All the characters mentioned in my dispatches are true and real life. Any resemblance to persons dead or living is purely intentional. However, the same cannot be said about the events.)